Monday, January 3, 2011

January 2nd, 2011(!). 8:45 AM

we had Christmas and New Years and single parenting and baking and preparing for a move and WHEW. But before all those's an update on Mama and the Squiddos.

35 weeks. I will state for the record that somehow this pregnancy has gone by incredibly quickly and dragged on for years. I am very much at the "please dear Lord am I done yet?" point. But I have been trying to savor these last few weeks with Colin being an only child. I don't know how well I am doing, I am in a lot physical pain with the belly burgeoning larger and larger, and I am exhausted a lot. But my favorite times are when he and I cuddle up with a book and he tells me the story.

I have said it before and I'll say it again that 3 is the worst age so far. And the best. I have a bright, exuberant, energy filled kid and I am trying to reconcile my very low key personality with his need to be going going going. The last few months have brought an ability to play independently quite well and I am eternally grateful for the respite. He loves to build and imagine stories. He is still narrating his play and has no desire to capture it through art or writing (much to my sorrow all the usual toddler craft blah blah holds ZERO appeal for my rough and tumble boy). The downside of the bright and energetic personality is the myriad power struggles we go through. I am learning to choose my battles and more than once this winter we have left the house shoeless, thank God we live in Arizona. Any advice on how to cope with a smart kid asserting his independence in deliberate defiance of requests is greatly appreciated!

I have been having the usual weird pregnancy dreams (babies being born as fish, finding that my husband's father is actually an evil genius set on world domination, losing Colin in an amusement park only to find him running a roller coaster, you know that old chestnut) and insomnia and nonstop peeing. Nights have been rough, my Braxton-Hicks are a daily thing and the heartburn is miserable (another baby born with a full head of hair I bet!) but all complaints aside I feel very ready for this next boy. Not in the sense that we have the boys' room all set up (we don't) or that I know how Colin, ever possessive of his mother, will deal with the new interloper (this makes me nervous), but in the sense that we are ready for our family to be together and I am ready to meet my son. We have a perfectly lovely name chosen, we have an amazing support system in place to help us through this transitional period, and I feel less anxious about this birth than the last. I am grateful for the confidence I'm feeling these days...even as I suffer tha aches and pains of the last 6 weeks of pregnancy.

It will be QUITE a transitional period too as our family prepares to move out of the house we have lived in for the last 4 years and into a much smaller place MUCH closer to our church where we spend lots of time. The ability to do this is a blessing, and it will be a lot of work (and a lot of getting rid of 4 years of accumulated clutter!) but when we are in our new place I will be super super grateful to not have to drive 45 minutes to church 3 times a week!
The holidays have well and truly kicked my ass but I enjoyed so many moments in them. Here's hoping the next year will allow me to build on the lessons I've learned so far and experience a million more marvelous memories!


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