Real Life Halloween Decorations

we had some ants decide to come live with us. I hated them so I decided to massacre them with a visit from our ecofriendly, church hookup ($50 off!), all natural exterminators! WHEE!
A tall thin gentleman around 50 or so came over and spread around some ant bait and sprayed our walls, he reminded me a of an older stretched out version of my husband as he explained the natural processes that went into making this non-toxic to animals and kiddos, safe for the environment, pesticide and bait. He explained how the dozen or so crickets I keep catching and releasing are more than just good luck they have been taking out a fire ant colony that sprang up in our neighbors yard that was encroaching on ours! I asked if he was going to spray inside and he said that even though it's not harmful to little ones and animals he would rather not add another layer of chemicals to our house and that since the ants were coming from outside once the outside ants were taken care of the inside ones would just disappear! He praised my use of cinnamon over our doorways and in our windowsills, "that's how my grandmother kept ants out of the pantry!" I totally loved him.

And then it happened.

He was taking a look under our patio furniture ("no one goes to hang out back in Arizona most of the summer, now is the time to check for spiders and other stuff") for the usual culprits and called me outside. He pointed at two round yellowish things stuck underneath a patio chair.
"Those are black widow egg sacs"
"HOLY. CRAP."
"oh that's nothing. There's mama!" He said calmly, pointing across the patio at a largeish black spider (a word of warning if you are squeamish, that's a link to a picture of what our spider looked like exactly, turns out not all black widows tell tale red mark is totally obvious...the more you know!) he had swept aside with his sweepy tool. "I used a fairly toxic spray on her and on the egg area, keep the little guy and the puppy dog inside for a while, I hope you don't mind"
"Are you kidding? Thank you. Couldn't you just stomp her with your boot?"
"Nah, she'll be gone in a minute or so"
And sure enough she was already curling up and rolling around.
I am not ashamed to say I cheered a little.
I'm sure this makes me a terrible Christian. Cheering as a living thing was poisoned and died in front of me...but I won't lie. I'm fine with it.


Thanks especially to our exterminator, who came highly recommended. You were mighty smart Bob and I am glad you insisted on checking the furniture out back. (he found some egg sacs in front as well and some juvenile widows but no sign of "mama" he sprayed and put bait down there too. Check your patios Arizonans!)